Memory 2: Today, we talk about talking with hidden motives

Sunny said that my blog too boring cause dont have profanities (vulgarities). I CANT TYPE THEM HERE or else wont sound "philosophical" lol. Beautable/Hamble said that my intro is too long winded and also quite confusing. YOU ARE JUST SLOW. From now on i will try to have more paragraphs cause i realised the post is really too long, hahaha my fault.

Okay, today we shall discuss about people talking to each other with hidden motives. First of all, there is absolutely nothing wrong in that, unless it is to really backstab the person to the extreme. Otherwise the most common and honest "hidden motive" to talk to someone would be simply just - i want that person to listen to me, to hear my problems or my views, most of all to allow me to express myself.

Of course the hidden motives in this memory that we are talking about are not as simple as just "i want someone to listen to me", more of motives like "i want to find out some gossip" or "i want to know a secret". For guys it would more commonly be "i want to talk and get to know that cute girl over there". For worse case memories, we have motives like "i want to know your secrets so i can bitch about u" or spreading a half true rumour to a loudmouth in school or at work just to spoil someone's reputation.

People do this simply because we HAVE to, not that we WANT to or not, its just a natural part of us. Because everything that we do, we need a reason, otherwise there is nothing to blame or work for. Even stoning in the room requires a reason for your mind and body to do it, you are stoning because u are bored or tired of thinking not because u simply just want to stone, but "simply want to stone" is also a reason hahahaha. Everything that has a cause - has an effect, just like how an action will cause a reaction. Therefore this paragraph has totally no meaning in explaining why people talk to each other with hidden motives, i just felt like typing all that rubbish LOL. It was supposed to link to another topic but i want to be specific, or else people say its confusing AGAIN. If you did have a certain sense of enlightenment after reading this paragraph then i can only say 1 thing - GOOD FOR YOU.

Back to the memory, so how do we overcome or tackle this "problem"?

I would not say that it is a problem, more of a choice of whether u want to be honest in your conversations or not. As i said earlier, there is nothing wrong in having hidden motives when you talk to another person. Personally i have done that 1001 times already, even now the reason for typing all these philosophical rubbish for you all to read is just so that i can express my opinions on certain issues in life, or like what my coach sam like to call it - life lessons. But what we can do is to be honest to ourselves and also to those whom we converse with. I mean if the hidden motive is harmless, why not just let the person know directly? It doesnt matter which part of the conversation you "declare" your motive, just by being honest is good enough. You dont have to act friendly by saying "eh hi how are you? Long time never see already, want to catch up?" but actually you dont give a shit about that person's well being, your true intention is just to sell him/her products. Of course if you truly want to catch up with that person AND also sell your product, by all means just do it but i think its better to try to sell the product first before catching up, or else the person might misunderstand.

I believe by being honest in your conversations, even with stupid motives, the other party will truly listen to you. And also it is very easy to tell that you are not communicating "truthfully", even the simplest words like "how are u?" can sound fake. Once again u can tell me "aiya who dont know about this?" but many people always try to go one round by being nice then link to their actual motive, which i find it quite comical at times when they try too hard. Honest communication has become a habitual problem in our daily lives, and that will become our next topic =)

Okay i think today's post abit retarded, you must consider the fact that i am typing this at 1am plus, so my brain really not thinking, i already tried my best!

- Between the words spoken from the heart and those spoken from the mind, they will sound the same to the ears but heard differently from the heart -